Almost Perfect Read online

  "I wouldn't count on that," she called to Mama's retreating back. When the woman's laugh drifted back to her, she felt another old longing well inside-why couldn't she have a mother like Mama? Someone with grit?

  When she was alone, she glanced at her watch. She had three hours until the meeting. Plenty of time to check in with Amy and Christine to let them know she'd arrived safely.

  Back inside, she wrestled her suitcase onto the mattress, snarled at her copy of How to Have a Perfect Life, rummaged past several pairs of sandals, and dug out her sturdy little laptop. Seconds later, she was plugged into the phone jack next to the big ugly chair.

  Opening her e-mail, she scanned new messages from her friends. Over the years they'd kept their e-mail conversations going until it was now as much a part of their daily lives as waking up in the morning. This time of day during the week, Amy would be sitting at her desk and generally responded within seconds. Christine wouldn't respond until she woke up to get ready for the graveyard shift at the ER.

  When she finished reading, Maddy started a new thread.

  Subject: Well, I made it.

  Message: And can I just say, I want to shoot Jane Redding for writing that book? "Leave your past behind." What a crock!

  Amy: Uh-oh. I take it your first meeting with Joe didn't go well.

  Maddy: You might say that. Which proves Jane was wrong. The past never goes away. It's like the clothing mistakes in the back of your closet. You can forget about them for long stretches, but the minute you dig past your current clothes, there they are, right where you left them, some of them even uglier than you remembered. They haven't magically vanished, or gotten pretty while you weren't looking.

  Amy: I don't think Jane meant we should or could forget it. I think she meant we have to accept it and move on, without letting where you've been control where you're going.

  Maddy: Ugh! Christine, why aren't you online? I need a bitching buddy, not maturity. Although, Amy, you're right. I'm sure when I'm feeling calmer, I'll agree. Right now, though, I'd rather shoot Jane. Or Joe. Yeah, actually, I could really get into shooting Joe.

  Chapter 4

  Maddy looked up from the notes she'd been reviewing for the staff meeting and realized it was two minutes past four o'clock. Yikes! Where had the time gone? After her e-mail exchange with Amy, she'd jumped into airing out the apartment and unpacking her clothes. Once she'd made some headway into stamping the place as her own, she'd pulled out all the material Mama had sent her when she'd agreed to take the job. In her determination to be well prepared, she'd lost all track of time.

  Arriving late was not the way to show Joe what a mature, responsible adult she was.

  Stuffing her notes into her big purse, she raced out the door and toward the wooded trail she assumed led to the main part of the camp. Her flat sandals slipped on the damp earth, making her wish she'd taken an extra minute to put on sensible footwear. Especially since she'd gone on a shopping spree before leaving Austin to buy some shoes that could actually be termed "sensible."

  The trail gave way to a sun-drenched field, with the office to her far left. She increased her pace to a light run, forgetting about the thin mountain air. By the time she passed a log cabin with a sign proclaiming it the chief's lodge, her head was spinning.

  She made out several people gathered on the covered area behind the office and prayed Joe wasn't among them yet. With a last spurt of energy, she leapt onto the patio. "Sorry I'm late." She sucked in a breath. "I got… caught up… unpacking."

  Several heads turned her way, but with the sun-spots in her eyes, all she could make out was silhouettes standing or sitting around a picnic table-all of them too small to be Joe, thank goodness.

  "Actually, you're fine." Mama's voice came from one of the seated silhouettes. "We haven't started yet."

  "Yeah, we're waiting for God to join us," a younger voice said.

  "God?" Maddy's eyes adjusted enough to recognize the three girls she'd seen earlier, and two others she hadn't.

  "He also answers to sir!" The blonde who'd driven the sports car snapped a smart salute, making the others laugh.

  "They mean Joe," Mama clarified as she rose. "Let me introduce you. Everyone, this is Madeline Mills, our new arts and crafts coordinator."

  "Please, call me Maddy." She acknowledged the round of welcomes with a wave.

  "This is Carol, our assistant director." Mama gestured to a pretty young woman sitting on the table with her legs primly crossed. Like the others, she wore shorts and a polo shirt, making Maddy realize that maybe her shoes weren't the only thing she should have changed. "Carol's been a part of Camp Enchantment for… how long?"

  "Fourteen years." Carol's smile held genuine welcome. "I've gone from camper to counselor to assistant director."

  "Sandy here is our liberal arts coordinator." Mama motioned to the owner of the sports car, then moved on to the statuesque black girl. "And Dana."

  "Outdoor sports." Dana gave Maddy's hand a firm shake. "How ya doing?"

  "Leah coordinates our nature studies." Mama motioned to a petite Asian girl seated on the far bench, then moved on to the last of the three girls who'd been in the parking lot, the tomboy with cropped brown hair. "And Bobbi is our water recreation coordinator."

  "You know, head lifeguard." Bobbi raised the whistle that hung around her neck and blew. The shrill sound nearly drowned out the screams of protest as everyone covered their ears.

  "So," Maddy said when the noise died down, "did all of you start out as campers?"

  "You bet," Sandy confirmed, and they all launched into singing, " 'We are family, I got all my sisters with me.' "

  Maddy was struck by how very young they looked. Logically, she knew the gap was only about a decade, but it suddenly seemed like a millennium. Although the gap wasn't just the age. These were "good girls." She wanted to laugh at the thought of these squeaky-clean kids working for Joe. And herself being dropped among them. Oh well, she decided, if she could become fast friends with Amy and Christine, she could find a way to fit in here.

  A tingle of awareness brushed the back of her neck. She turned as Joe appeared in the doorway to the office. For a split second, their gazes collided. She braced herself for a blast of cold anger, or the spark of heat she'd seen in his eyes the instant before his mother walked in.

  Instead, his gaze moved on as if he hadn't even seen her. He strode forward with a stack of papers, his years of military discipline showing in every step. "All right," he said, as if rallying the troops for a briefing. "Let's get this meeting under way."

  The coordinators scurried into their seats, taking up notepads and pens. Maddy sat next to Mama,! while Joe took the seat farthest from her on the opposite bench.

  "We have a lot of ground to cover." Joe skimmed a look around the table that somehow skipped over her. "First, though, I'd like to say welcome back to Camp Enchantment."

  A cheer went up from the other coordinators.

  He glanced at his mother. "Do you have anything to say before we get down to business?"

  Affection and pride softened Mama's face. "I thought I'd let you make the announcement."

  "Announcement?" Carol asked.

  "Nothing major." Joe shrugged. "Only that my stint as camp director has officially been bumped up from temporary to permanent."

  Maddy watched him carefully as a second cheer went up. One corner of his sculpted lips lifted in a smile, but no readable emotion showed in his eyes.

  "And here I thought you'd all go screaming for the front gate." His teasing tone was subtle, the same wry wit he'd once used to charm her.

  "Not likely." Carol laughed flirtatiously. It wasn't overt, or even sexual, yet Maddy felt a bond between Joe and every female at the table-a genuine affection that clearly excluded her.

  The exclusion, though, allowed her to study him and notice how he'd changed. He wore his hair short and neat, not boot-camp short but not as long as when they'd been dating. His face had hardened too, become more
sharply defined.

  "In making my decision," he said, "I thought a lot about Camp Enchantment, and the children who pass through here. I know personally what a difference a positive environment can make."

  Maddy cocked her head, intrigued by the ease with which he spoke, considering the personal nature of his words. He'd certainly matured from the boy who sat in the back of the classroom, slumped in his chair with a practiced look of disinterest.

  "Camp Enchantment is more than just a place for kids to come to spend a few weeks in the out-of-doors," he continued. "It's a place steeped in tradition. Since it was founded in the early nineteen hundreds, the Bobcats and the Foxes have been racing canoes and competing on the archery range."

  "Go, Bobcats!" Dana punched the air with her fist.

  "Go, Foxes!" Sandy answered in kind.

  This time Joe's smile made it to his eyes, a rarity that turned Maddy's insides to pure jelly. "Through teamwork and healthy competition we have helped kids gain the confidence to achieve their personal best. The Rangers taught me the importance of teamwork. In this case, the objective isn't to cap-ture a spit of land or defeat an enemy, but to live up to our motto."

  " 'Building character and memories to last a lifetime,' " Mama quoted.

  "Exactly." Joe nodded. "As we're working together over the next week, preparing for the annual invasion of five hundred campers, I'd like all of us to keep that objective in mind and look for ways to make this summer a positive experience for everyone.

  "Knowing all of you, I'm sure you've been thinking about the summer as well, and what projects you'd like to do. So, I'd like to go around the table and have each of you share your goals. Carol, since you're always the queen of organization, we'll start with you."

  "Okay." Carol opened a folder and started handing out papers. "I've made a schedule-"

  Bobbi burst out laughing. "What?" Carol frowned.

  "Nothing." Joe smoothed the smile from his face. "We all live for your schedules."

  "As well you should." Carol nodded smartly and launched into what needed to be done by what day in order to ensure the efficient running of the camp office.

  The others followed with their ideas for the summer and the plans they'd been working on. Listening to them, Joe found himself as impressed this year as he had been last with their ideas. Too bad their enthusiasm wasn't enough to distract him from the woman who sat catty-corner from him.

  Maddy, he kept thinking, what are you doing here?

  She looked unbearably appealing, naturally sexy, and completely out of place. He'd watched her dash across the game field with her skirt swirling about her calves and those ridiculously inappropri-ate shoes. Even with her feet tucked safely out of sight, his mind kept drifting to the bright orange sandals with long laces wrapped about her ankles- and how much he'd like to unwrap those laces.

  Then there was the yellow top. Tank tops normally looked better on someone with tanner skin and more muscle definition. On her, though, it worked. God, it worked. The knit fabric cupped her breasts, showed a hint of cleavage, and filled his head with thoughts of running his hands up and down her arms.

  Or simply holding her hand.

  He'd forgotten the way they used to hold hands everywhere they went. Now the memory returned along with the memory of other little pleasures. It hadn't all been about sex. There had been genuine caring. At least on his end.

  "Maddy," Carol said, jolting him with the mere sound of the name, "since this is your first time working at a summer camp, do you need help planning your activities?"

  "Not too much, actually."

  He felt her hesitate as she flicked a nervous glance his way. Then she straightened, as if coming to the same conclusion he had: that pretending to be strangers was the best way to get through this meeting.

  "Mama sent lots of information from previous years, plus I found a bunch of books filled with craft projects. Here's a list of projects I'd like to do." She started her own stack of papers around the table. "I'm open for suggestions, though, since y'all have more experience working with the kids."

  Taking one of the sheets, he saw that she was remarkably well prepared for the job. So much for being able to fire her on the grounds of incompe-tence. That would have been too neat and easy. And life, he'd learned, was rarely neat or easy.

  Finally they finished dividing up the work detail for cleaning and prepping the camp.

  "Okay," he said, glancing at his watch, ready to wrap things up. "I think that covers enough for now. We have an hour before dinner, which will be a hamburger cookout by the river."

  "So we're free to go?" Dana asked.

  "You're dismissed," Joe confirmed.

  "Woo-hoo!" Dana jumped up and turned to Bobbi. "You know what that means."

  "Badminton rematch," Bobbi answered. "Prepare to get trounced."

  "In your dreams!" The two took off at a full run.

  The other counselors followed at a more sedate pace. Joe had an uneasy moment when Maddy didn't immediately stand. Surely she wasn't going to sit there with nothing but his mother as a buffer between them. Luckily, Carol turned when she reached the edge of the patio. "Maddy, aren't you coming?"

  "Oh." She straightened as if surprised they would include her. "Yes, of course." She grabbed -her enormous hippie purse and followed. Apparently her fondness for funky, out-of-date clothes hadn't faded.

  Now that her back was to him, he watched her openly. The others quickly closed ranks around her, and she laughed at something one of them said. The sound sent him hurtling back to the first time he'd seen her. It was right after he'd moved from Albuquerque to Austin. He was walking down the hall of his new high school with his head down, his hands in his pocket, and a hitch in his step that let everyone know "Yeah, I'm bad." He heard a laugh, not a girly giggle but an all-out laugh.

  He looked up and saw Maddy walking toward him with a pack of girls. The sight of her throwing back her head and laughing stopped him in his tracks. He stood there bug-eyed as she continued past him, sucker punched by something that went beyond the normal adolescent-hormones-gone-haywire. One thought rang in his brain: I want. The wanting filled him with an intensity he rarely allowed. Couldn't afford to allow. But with Maddy, he'd dared more than want. He'd dared to have.

  And he'd relearned one of life's cruelest lessons, that having and keeping are not the same thing.

  He turned to his mother, who sat calmly watching him.

  "I have one question," he finally said.

  "Yes?"

  "What is she doing here?"

  "Maddy?" His mother blinked her blue eyes as if the question confused her. Which he knew it didn't. Not for a minute. "She's here to work as our new A and C coordinator."

  "But why? It's been bugging me all afternoon. Considering the way she dumped me, I have a hard time believing that she came out here hoping to take up where we left off. And if that was what she wanted, why the job? Why not just contact me?"

  His mother pursed her lips, considering. "And if she had called, what would you have said?"

  "Nothing. I would have hung up." Then promptly had heart failure.

  "Exactly. It's a little harder to hang up when she's here in person."

  "Conflicting emotions clamped about his chest.

  "Are you saying she does want to get back together?"

  "I didn't 'say' that."

  "Okay-" He ran a hand over his hair and tried to think. "Let's say she does, which blows my mind to even think about. Why the job? Why not come out here on the pretext of visiting you? Why would a thirty-two-year-old woman travel hundreds of miles to take a job at a summer camp? It can't be for the money. The job doesn't pay that much. So what is she doing here?"

  "Why don't you ask her?"

  Because that would involve talking to her.

  Leaning forward, she patted his hand. "Ask her, Joe. Otherwise you're just going to drive yourself crazy wondering."

  He dropped his head forward in defeat. "I hate it when you're right."


  "Yes, I know." She rose and kissed the top -of his head.

  After she left, he sat a long time-driving himself crazy.

  Maddy returned to her apartment after a miserably awkward evening and checked her e-mail. Christine had finally chimed in on her earlier exchange with Amy.

  Message: Come on, Mad, how bad can it be? So the man was startled to see you. He'll recover and things will be fine.

  Maddy: I don't think so. We just spent three hours together at a hamburger cookout where we managed to not exchange one single word.

  Christine, who was apparently online, responded right away: I take it the man's a brooder.

  Maddy: Try World-Class Brooder. And he seems to have matured a lot over the years, but apparently that hasn't changed.

  Christine: So what did you do in the past when he brooded?

  Maddy stared at the screen, remembering so many things. A bittersweet ache settled in her chest as she typed her reply: I'd find a way to make him laugh. I don't think that's an option anymore. I feel like such an idiot for coming here. How can I make the next twelve weeks bearable for both of us?

  Christine: Okay, I'll ignore the obvious wisecrack about sex and try my hand at some serious advice. Reread that xchapter in Jane's book about getting along with men in the workplace. It pains me to say this (since I'm still pissed about her using us), but I actually agree with her there. And remember that's ALL you have to do-get along with this guy. He's not the main reason you're there. Patching things up and having wild sex were just a potential side benefit. Your real goal is to get your work in a gallery. Don't lose sight of that. And don't forget that Amy and I think you're wonderful, no matter what some brooding male thinks.

  Maddy: Thanks, C.

  Christine: You're welcome. Now you go get some sleep. I'm off to save lives.

  Closing the laptop, Maddy glanced at the glossy self-help book sitting on the end table next to her. She picked it up with a sigh. If nothing else, maybe reading would help her sleep.